By Dale Carnegie
Let’s start with my story
I am not a guy who himself never experienced depression and telling you how to overcome it only to write some content. I have experienced it, and overcome. So, I genuinely want to share, how I did it.
Many people can relate to this scene, or at least have heard about it, that in most houses there is one man who creates trouble for his whole family. Because of his addictions to drugs and alcohol. When a person gets madly addicted to such things, he loses control over himself and thinks less about his family.
I had the same person in my family too. He is my brother. Let’s go back in 2011 when I and my mother came to Mumbai to live with my brother. Back then my brother was a great human being. He always took care of mine and my mother. After coming from duty, he always used to bring Chicken Rice, Chinese Food, or Burgers with him. You know as a Kid, we like when someone brings food with them. We were a happy family.
Everything was going well until he started drinking. At first, it wasn’t a big issue but later when he drank too much, things changed. The happy, positive atmosphere turned into a negative atmosphere. He used to speak a very abusive language. Him shouting all night, lights on, and the smell of alcohol and cigarettes never let us sleep.
He was barely under control until he consumed drugs. From then on, our home was no longer a home, It was hell. Only fights for money, negativity, depression, and that’s it. Though, he was the only person who was earning. We had no other option nor a home to live, So we had to tolerate all this.
Then, It was 2013, and I was in 9th standard. The circumstances going in the home, never let me concentrate anywhere. I remember for me, the beautiful thing about that time was the time spent in school with my friends. Whenever I was in school with my friends, I used to forget about home-problems.
In 2015, after two years, a terrible thing happened. We never imagined that this could occur.
My brother lost his government job and went to jail. Within a month, he was relieved, but the government gave him 1/4 of his salary.
My mother had to manage all the household expenses within that salary. It was frustrating, but the brother wasn’t changed at all. Somehow, we managed two spend the next two years with this. But in 2016, another thing happened which put me into more depression.
Back then, I was in love. Which at the beginning was like a fairy tale, a gorgeous period of my life, but It was one-sided love. So later, when I faced rejections, and all expectations of being together were crumpled, I became sadder.
I think the reason behind getting mad in love with her was sadness. I needed someone, with whom I can be happy. I wanted someone whom I can call mine. So many things were there. In short, I needed her to help me to get out of critical time. But It didn’t happen.
Now, I am happy about that. I am glad that it didn’t. Because from then on, I learned that my happiness is in my hands. And I never need anyone to make my life beautiful. 2017 was a distressing year for me, but the only good thing happened was, I started reading books.
The first book which I read taught me a lot. It was, “Man’s search for meaning” by Dr. Viktor E. Frankl. Let me tell you a scene from it. When the author remained caught in the concentration camp, many people died. But he and some of his friends were alive till all the prisoners were released. The author answers why very few people left alive because a few had a will to live, a few hoped.
The author says hope is everything. If you don’t hope for a better future in your critical time, you will not survive through it. So, it’s the very first thing you need to follow to overcome depression. The power of hope is mighty. No matter through what circumstances you’re going. Hope that one day it will all work out great. And that’s what I did first to bring the happy days back.
Using Formula To Overcome Depression
When my brother lost his job, and after that also he had no changes in him, we always had a fear of returning to our village. And I never wanted to go, because then I was in college. I had dreams, and I thought it wouldn’t be possible to fulfill those dreams if I go to the village.
At that time I read a book, “How to stop worrying and start living” by Dale Carnegie. And I learned this magic formula to overcome depression. I followed it.
First, I thought about the worst that, Yes, My brother might lose job for forever and we may return to our village. Second, I accepted it and prepared myself to face that. I used to tell myself that, There is no problem If I go back to the village. I will still make my dreams come true. I will work hard and will do whatever it takes, with whatever tools I have. Third, I tried to improve upon all this by working on my dreams right away. I read books to improve my knowledge and wisdom. I always loved to share my insights with others and to motivate them.
Eventually, I found about this blogging stuff, So, just gathered some useful information, and launched my blog in a month. The thing we were most worried about never happened, My brother got his job back in the mid of 2017. And from then on he was under control, he had a little change in him.
When for the first time, I hoped for a bright future, things started to change. I used to do meditation, and affirmation to positively feed my mind with good thoughts. When I did this, I saw a positive change in me. As kept doing this, I became more positive and peaceful. After following the magic formula, I was free from worry, stress, mental pain, and depression.
For a more brief explanation about overcoming depression, anxiety, worry, check out his book – How To Stop Worrying And Start Living.
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